After our daughter lydia was diagnosed with a terminal illness, I spoke with a friend who had lost children to the same disease. Both of us being people of faith, she told me that god would do a miracle in our lives. that miracle, unfortunately, would not be the healing of our daughter. she told me the miracle of our story would be that god would heal me.

It is not the miracle we wanted or hoped for, but it is the miracle we got.

in the nine years since her death, i can look back and see the different places where my broken heart has been healed in ways i never would have expected. my hope is to use this space to share some of how my grief and healing have come about, to offer practical ideas when you're dealing with the death of someone you love, and to give those who have lost the hope that you are not alone and that healing will come in time.

But don’t let the pictures of pretty flowers fool you. Grief can be messy, unlovely, and gross. But it is so often mixed with loveliness, courage, and joy. i approach conversations about grief with as much honesty as i can, but i often use humor mixed with it because honesty can sometimes be too much on it’s own.

I don’t want to overwhelm the newly grieving, so if this your loss is recent, start slow. Feel free to ask questions, even if they sound awful or are confusing. i’m here with you. thanks for visiting with me.